The Different Stages of Heartbreak – If we are going to be realistic with each other, then we would all agree that not all relationships are meant to go on forever or end in marriage. Some relationships are just not meant to be no matter how hard you try to make it work.
Heartbreak can be really tough to deal with because, to be honest, a breakup in your relationship equals to a significant loss on your part.
You know that feeling when you have been waking up to sweet texts from your partner, hanging out together, making decisions about the future with both of you seeing each other in it, planning marriage and debating about kids’ names and suddenly, all that has come to an end because you have both broken up? It can be a really hard reality to deal with and some people find it hard to get over a heartbreak real quick because they don’t want to accept that a break up has really happened with the person they thought they would spend the rest of their life with.
To get over heartbreak faster, you need to know the different stages of breakup and how to get through them.
1. Living in Denial
When a breakup first happens, you refuse to accept that it has really happened. You think it’s just some misunderstanding that could be resolved between you too. You don’t want to accept that your partner has really ended things with you. You keep waiting for an apology call or text from them to tell you it was some sort of joke or something but it never comes. You find it hard to tell people that you both have broken up and you are still thinking of yourself as someone who is actually in a relationship.
This is the second stage of heartbreak. When you finally accept the reality that your relationship has really come to an end, your anger begins to rise. You become angry at your new status because you can’t help it. You are angry at your Ex for making you feel so helpless. You are angry at the world for being unfair to you, somehow. You are angry at cupid for making you fall in love in the first place. In fact, you are angry at everything. The best thing to do at this stage would be to go off social media for a while. Don’t go venting or screaming out your rage on Facebook, Twitter, and their likes.
3. Mourning in Recluse
At this stage, you begin to mourn your loss. You find it hard to hang out with your friends. Somehow, you now prefer being by yourself in your place. The only thing you want to do is to be by yourself forever without anybody, no friends, and no family. You don’t want anyone to console you or tell you “you will be okay”. You just want to be alone all by yourself, mourning what was not meant to be.
Read further on: Jane's heartbreaking story.
4. Uncontrollable Tears
You are unable to think of anything else apart from your break up. The reality is sinking in and you begin to cry. You can’t stop the tears. You keep thinking of everything that could have been and you cry the more. You can’t stop the tears because it hurts and you are hurting. Although this stage might seem hard, but it’s the stage where you are now really dealing with the heartbreak and the hurt and pain that accompanies it. The more you cry, the more you get better so it is important that you cry as much as you want and let it all out.
After letting all the tears out, you begin to wonder what went wrong. Was it something that you did? Did you mess up somehow? What exactly went wrong with your relationship? You try to go over every single detail of your breakup and try to find out how it was your fault. You blame yourself for the breakup. You try to justify the breakup of something that you did and end up apportioning the blames on yourself. Although the break up might really have been your fault and maybe it wasn’t, you don’t need to kick yourself so hard by putting the blame on yourself.
6. Missing your Ex
It is important that you delete your ex from all your social media accounts at this stage. Why? Because at this point, you are really missing and pining for him and you can’t stop viewing his profile, checking if he/she is online, stalking to see if they have a new update on Facebook, Twitter or WhatsApp. You basically become a monitoring spirit.
You might even be tempted to send them a message about how you miss them and if you could get a second chance. You try to apologize for everything you did and you didn’t. So, it is advisable that you delete them from your life so as to help you get over that stage.
Read further on: How to overcome loneliness after heartbreak.
Now, you are trying to get back to your daily activities. You try to hang out with your friends, do something fun and get back to running your life like you were before the heartbreak. You have finally come to terms with single-hood again. At this stage, you might be looking to get in a new relationship but you have to be really careful because you could just be putting on a facade rather than moving on.
8. Absolute Acceptance
You have finally accepted the reality that the relationship is over for good. You no longer cry when you reminisce about the past sweet memories. Your heart no longer aches as it used to do in the early stage of the heartbreak and you no longer stalk your ex just to know what’s going on in their life. Although you are bound to still feel a little sadness and regret that it didn’t work out, you have this hope that a better relationship is out there waiting for you somewhere!