We all keep looking out for someone to complete us. We grow up wrapped up in some fairy tale fantasy that there’s someone out there for us. A special someone designed specifically for us.
Someone that will like what we like and laugh at our jokes and would be there with us in the storm. We would meet this person, fall head over heels and this person will love us unconditionally despite our many imperfections. Our soulmate. The person to come and complete us.
We believe this fantasy of finding a soulmate in the perfect person. We watched it in all the movies growing up, the fairy tale ‘PRINCESS marries the PRINCE‘ our mothers tell us about ‘THE WOMEN MADE FOR US‘ society drums it into our system to wait for ‘MR RIGHT‘ and we go through life hooked on the notion that if we just looked harder, if we just tried harder, then someone might come and complete us.
We go around scanning everyone we meet, looking for signs that this time, the person we are with is “THE RIGHT ONE” Well look no further, I found you your soulmate and you will be surprised.
The human mind is powerful, we don’t lose faith easily, so we go through breakup after breakup, heartbreak after heartbreak, still looking forward, hoping that yet, the next person would be our soulmate. The one to complete us after all, and if we found this person, we would sail into happily ever after?
After all, didn’t sleeping beauty wake from her slumber after true love’s kiss? Did the prince not find Cinderella with the glass slippers? Even Fiona got the ogre, so of course there is a one out there. (And he is pretty handsome for an ogre)
But let’s stop to consider this; Even if there was a special someone out there designed specifically for us, that likes the same things that we like, its still not that simple. This person needs to live in our city (or at least visit the places that we might be). This person needs to speak our language and understand our tradition and obviously this person needs to be an image of perfection.
It’s clear, the odds are not very good! But don’t worry, you still have a soulmate. You might be thinking “that’s crazy, not me! I don’t want a perfect person”
Unfortunately; whether we like it or not, we all look for our soulmate in that perfect somebody that knows all the right answers and can do no wrong (after all, a soulmate is supposed to be your perfect fit right?) The prince out there. Or the Cinderella far away. But life is not a perfect fairy tale story and there is no one that will come and complete you! But that’s not to say you do not have a soulmate, I told you, I found your soulmate and he/she is not out there.
Yep; there is no soulmate out there for you. But there is one within the vicinity and its YOU. Yes, YOU. You are your own soulmate. Let’s face it, you are the only one who will love yourself unconditionally despite your many flaws, and you and you alone can make yourself truly happy. So now you know! You are a WHOLE PERSON period. You are the WHOLE DEAL and nothing is MISSING. You are THAT PERFECT SOMEONE that completes you and you, all of you, are your own SOULMATE.
You do not need any one to complete you cause you are complete.
So here are a few thoughts to embrace yourself in when going into a relationship and if you are already in a relationship, you can give your relationship a make over and start seeing both you and your partner in a new light.
1. You are a whole being and you don’t need any one to complete you. (You don’t want a relationship based on co-dependency)
2. You can be and should be happy alone. (Being single doesn’t have to mean you are lonely and unhappy)
3. You have something to offer. (You are not a poor princess or in a slumber, no one is doing you a favor being with you)
4. You love yourself (And you don’t have time for anyone who would not love and respect you)
5. So once you have memorized these simple facts, you will begin to look at relationships in a new light and trust me, it will become easier to leave mediocre relationship and focus on amazing relationships with amazing people who don’t have to be perfect or be “the one” but are amazing all the same.
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