You wish to know how to disvirgin a girl without feeling pains? Well, you are in the right place! This article is a complete guide for you on how to deflower your girl without causing her any form of pain whatsoever. Read on!

What is female virginity?

A female is said to be a virgin when she hasn’t engaged in vag*nal penetration through s*x before. This means that her hymen’s form is still intact. Not torn or ripped through.

Virginity means that the woman has not had her vag*na penetrated by a man’s manhood before. So, even if the woman has engaged in oral s*x, so far that her hymen’s still intact, she’s technically still a virgin.

You might be wondering what the hymen is?

Well, the hymen is a piece of fragile body tissue found at the entrance of a girl’s vag*na covering. It usually has a very small opening to allow for passage of blood during the girl’s menstrual flow. But it is just a tiny hole until penetration when it is completely torn or ripped.

The head of the man’s manhood is what rips the hymen. Usually but not all the time, ripping the hymen is usually associated with a brief discharge of blood. This is why in ancient Yoruba practices, the night of the marriage between the husband and the wife, the husband is supposed to inspect the white sheet they are expected to sleep on for inter course for blood stain. If he sees blood stain, then he really is married to a virgin.


But if otherwise, it’s a sign that his wife is probably not a virgin. That was of course in ancient Yoruba.

Nowadays, people rarely go through such unnecessary task. And sometimes, blood is not discharged after s*xual ripping. It happens. Also, the hymen could have been broken even when the woman hasn’t had her vag*na penetrated before. Maybe through hard tasks like carrying heavy load, cycling and so on.

So, if no blood is discharged after penetration, it doesn’t necessarily mean the girl is not a virgin. It might mean it had been broken as a result of too much hard work on the part of the girl.

Now we have a clear definition of virginity. Then we should go to the main part of the article.

How do you disvirgin a girl without causing her pain? Below are some important steps to follow:

1. You have to show her that you love her

For a girl to feel relaxed and assured, you need to show her that you care for her. Not just ordinary caring, but deep caring. Show her that you love her. Be sincere about it.

If you are sincere about your feelings for her, she can read it in your eyes. She will feel it in your body language if you are not being sincere about your feelings.

So, a go-to approach to making her have a pain free experience is to assure her that you do love her. Maybe in foreplay, you can just whisper sweet and sincere words into her ear, she will feel more secure. And when she is more secure, she can relax. When she relaxes, the less likely for her body to recognize your actions as pain or as a threat. So, your first step is to make her feel secure enough to relax by showing her through your words and actions that you do care for her.

Once she relaxes, the happiness hormones are released into her body system and once those hormones are released, they come with natural painkillers and decrease the likelihood of the female feeling any pain and also kill existing pain.

The only way you can get those hormones out into her system, is by making her feel really happy. And she will be really happy to have s*x with you, once she’s certain that you love her. Girls are wired that way.

According to research, girls have to have a strong connection to whoever they are sleeping with for the sake of the safety of their children that might be conceived as a result of this action. If the guy loves her, then he will help her and they will both raise the kids together. But if he doesn’t, he will desert her, once he hears that she’s pregnant. So, it’s only normal for a girl to look for love in the eyes and heart of a guy that wants to sleep with her.

2. Treat her like a real flower while undressing her

A woman is really indeed a delicate flower naturally. Because this is her first time at having s*x, you need to be as delicate as ever. Treat her and her body like you will treat a flower.

You should first start with gently kissing her. Note you have to be gentle about it,  if you want her to fully relax. Being rough about it will make her feel like she should panic and panicking will only elevate the pain when you want to do the real thing. The key is to make her totally trust you enough, to leave her body in your hands to take care of it.

That’s the key.

She needs trust, security and safety. That is the only way she will relax and then consequently be able to have her first vagin*l intercourse without feeling pain. After kissing a bit, you can start peeling off her clothes gently. While pulling off the clothes, you might want to dot kisses around and on her body with your mouth. Those little touches will mean a lot in the long run.

3. Start gently and slowly with foreplay

Foreplay is important. For a lady to enjoy lovemaking, there has to be foreplay. Foreplay is mostly comprised of touching her in delicate and sensitive parts.

You have to kiss her smoothly and gently, and after you can start to trail kisses from the top of her head to the entrance of her vag*na. It is important that you do foreplay. This is also to help her get ready for you and get moist down there. For if she is ready and moist, your manhood will be able to slide through easily and softly without too much friction that could cause her discomfort or pain. So while trailing kisses down her body, you can also gently tease her nipples with your fingers.

You are expected to trail kisses down her body with your mouth. When you get to her br*asts, you can very gently bite her nipples, this should excite her down there. Play with her bre*sts using your mouth, she will most likely find this erotic. And make her even more wet for you. Going down, you get to her navel or belly button. Lick and kiss her navel there too. And then finally, kiss her cl*toris.

Clitor*s is the stub on top of the opening of a female’s vag*na. The cl*toris is a very sensitive part of the vag*na and she can orgasm just by you stimulating the clitoris enough. You can stimulate her clitor*s by massaging it with your thumb or index finger or both. This is still part of foreplay and is meant to excite her body and make her more ready for you. The more lubricated she is, the easier for you to enter her, the lesser the pain she’ll feel when you enter her.

So, it is important to excite her body. Gently massage her clit*ris by rubbing it around and around with minimum force. You are to stop after sometime because if you continue, she will start to quicken which means she is very near to orgasm. But that is not your mission. You want to have vagin*l intercourse with her, not to give her a quick org*sm. So, after stimulating her cl*toris if you check her v*gina, you will find it most likely very wet. If you have been doing the steps earlier outlined, then she will most likely be very wet already. And being wet is good for both of you. Then you can gently insert a finger, preferably your index finger into her vag*na. You have to do this very gently though. There is much emphasis on the “very”. This is because she has never had anything enter her in there before.

So even as thin as your finger is, she will probably still wince when you insert it in her. But before you insert your finger in there, she has to be very, very wet and moist in her v*gina. It is important so she doesn’t get hurt or feel pain. If she isn’t wet there, it will be very painful for her. And since you said, you want to disvirgin her without her feeling any pain, then you should take this point very seriously.

Whatever you are doing to her, during this first time, you have to do gently. Maybe after this first time, then you can start to go rough and quick with her. But for now, slow and steady wins the race with your virgin.

Before inserting your finger into her, make sure your hands are washed before this! You don’t want to put peppery hands inside her. It will be really painful!

Wash your hands well! After inserting your finger into her, gently bring it out to the tip and then push it in back gently. Once you have done this like twice, then you can gently remove that finger and insert two fingers. By doing this, you are prepping her v*gina for your manhood size, so it won’t overwhelm her. Once the two fingers are in, pull in and out like before, for like three times. By then she will start to relax because she will start to get used to the feeling. Which will make the real penetration easier for her.

4. Gently and slowly penetrate her

After all that foreplay, then you can slowly and gently penetrate her with your manhood. Go in slowly.. Once the head of your manhood is in, ask her if you should go in further or whether you should stop. She will tell you how she feels. If she says proceed, then slowly go in deeper again. Ask her again how she feels.

It is important to ask her how she feels so that she can feel safe. And remember safety equals less pain. And you want this to be completely painless for her isn’t it? So, if she says to go on, then you can slide in fully. Just don’t start bumping her immediately. First slide out gently, then gently and slowly slide back in again. This is to allow her get used to the feeling. Once you ask her if she is ready and she says yes, then you can quicken your pace. Walk her through each and every step till she orgasms. If you do this well, she might ask for more. So it’s important not to mess things up the first time.

5. After the intercourse, ask her how she feels

This is very important to make her feel loved and safe. You need to show her that you care. And this is a very important step in showing care. Even if she is feeling any discomfort already, it will help alleviate the pain since she will relax into your arms knowing that you care for her. So you can ask her if she enjoyed it, what areas you can work on to help her enjoy it better. Ask her if she needs to sleep or if she needs some water.

Remember that because this is her first time, you have to treat her like a flower from the start to the finish. If she says she feels any discomfort, kindly pat her and comfort her that it will get easier and more enjoyable with time. It is important that you reassure her. That way, the next time you want to have s*x, she will be willing to and also looking forward to it. And also, she will most likely feel like it was enjoyable due to your caring touch-up.

Girls like to be pampered, in fact humans in general, love it. If you really follow this guide carefully, if anyone asks her how she felt about her first experience having s*x, she will most likely report it as a pleasant experience. Even if, she might have felt some discomfort when you were doing it, she will probably not note that. What she will note instead is how loving you were toward her and how much you pampered her. And also the both of you should cuddle after the s*x. Girls love to cuddle. They love to touch. Just cuddle her. She will love it. She might not ask for it, but really she wants it.

That above is your step by step guide on how to disvirgin a girl without feeling pains. If you remember to be gentle and sweet, she will most likely find it sweet and enjoyable rather than painful. Good luck!


About The Author

Team Lead - Contents

The brain behind Deedeesblog, Detola is a content writer, relationship coach, documentary photographer and Editor. Detola loves LOVE and believes that love is the greatest gift humans can give to one another. He coined the name thePhotoblogger after realizing how much he loves to tell visual stories of people and places. His vision is to document people living under $1 per day and places with tremendous potentials for investment opportunities. Deedeesblog is a platform of life and love documentary. Connect with Detola on

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