We broke up over a reason so unreasonable, and I have not been able to get over her. She was the best thing that happened to me back then when I was still growing up in this relationship thingy. She was as energetic as I was, always pushing me, always criticizing, very objective, beautiful and classy, very friendly at the same time. She gets so moody sometimes and it makes her so adorable and lovable. Yet we still broke up.
I met her after she broke up with her former boyfriend. She was extremely difficult at first, making sure she did not fail in passing the message as to how much she disliked guys. However, there was something about her I really liked, her beauty, the flash of her eyes, the laughter, her deep throated voice. I just fell in love with everything.
We met, talked for sometime, and then after about three months of getting to know each other, she agreed to go out with me. After service year and into the real world, I got my first job with a bank. She supported me all through the process, wanting to be with me, pray with me, love me too. We had our issues, yes and we thought we were going to spend the rest of our lives together. 6 months into the relationship, we started getting uncomfortable with each other. She wanted more, I wanted more.
She craved more loving and attention; I wanted to move to Lagos. It got so bad that I was simply carried away and over ambitious that I forgot I had a girlfriend, and she in turn found solace in the arms of another boy. Life! We allowed it to degenerate so bad that we broke up exactly a year to the dated we started dating.
Till today, I still ask myself, why did we even break up? It sounded foolish on our path and I couldn’t muster enough courage to ask her why. We had huge dreams and wanted to be better. She was everything I wanted but then, she messed up! I did too anyway!
I am sure I’m not the only one who gets to miss his ex, a lot of guys/ ladies would be experiencing this as well. You will begin to ask yourself: why the break, what went wrong, do I need re-evaluation going forward, do I miss him/her, Am I happy leaving him/her. Well, considering the fact that all that glitters are not gold, and the need to check if obviously you have outgrown that feeling over the years or the feeling of missing your ex keeps coming back, then you need toascertain some basic facts for you to truly understand that having her back might not be a bad idea.
1. Dating someone else and you always think about him/ her:
You started out your relationship with another person, yet you think about your ex and still want to be with him/ her. The fun you had, the whirlwind romance, the emotions is something you can’t just deal with. There is something missing in your present relationship and you had with that particular relationship. Missing your ex is very normal anyway and does not mean you want to get back, but when these emotions do not go away, you really need to hook up again.
2. You think they are with someone else and you can’t just think of it
Men, this part is crazy though. You can’t just think of it. You realize how awesome he/she was and then you can’t bring yourself into believing that someone else will enjoy that awesomeness. Something you have always reveled in.
3. You have given it enough time.
Time, they say heals all wounds. After so many years of being apart, have you tried reaching out to him/her. Maybe you even needed the time to grow up and then get back to talking, who knows? Maybe you needed the space to handle issues more maturely. The funny thing about relationships like this is the fact that you most times even forget what you two fought about. When you both realize that you may want to give it another try. Why waste time?
4. The issue can be fixed
You need to consider the reason why you broke up, and see if it is no longer a problem. If it isn’t, go ahead and make a call, and try to reach out. You may have ended things because he was a workaholic, she was too flashy, he was very possessive and she was difficult. Once you realize the issues are gone and no longer there anymore. Give it a shot!
5. You both want same thing
In your subsequent relationships, you may have realized that you don’t want what your partners want. I know this could be deflating when you realize that both of you don’t share the same ideals. Instead of hoping to the next guy/babe on the line. Do a drawback and check up on the ex you truly miss. See if what he/she wants to completely aligns with your thoughts and convictions and make a go for it.
6. The Grass wasn’t really greener on the other side
Now you have broken up, tried different guys and girls, yet you realized the grass isn’t greener on the other side. You might even been a goner when the grass is dead. LOL
In the event that you both realized this, then why not attempt to head back to the grass you once planted and attempt to water it.
7.You both believe in second chances
This is the most important part. There is no particular rule in relationships which says there shouldn’t be second chances. The point is, both of you should be wise and mature enough to want to give it your best shot. Both of you should be able to learn, forgive and re-ignite the passion. If you both are ready to work on your relationship. Do not hesitate to go for it. It could be the best thing to ever happen to you.
I trust you have other additions as well. Don’t miss out in the fun, drop it in the comments section below and let’s help each other have our exes back
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