Lifestyle Memoirs of a Lagos Boy

Is A 24-Year-Old Lady Too Young To Get Married?

24-year-old lady too young to get married

I need to ask this question though. Is a 24-year-old lady too young to get married?

So I made this post on whether 24 years is too young for a lady to get married on my Whatsapp story and I got a lot of reactions, few of which would be shared on the blog.

From personal experience, the moment you get to a certain age or reach certain societal status, people expect you to be married. I’m sure you agree to this.

Just this year alone, I had more than 20 friends ask me when I was going to get married. I even had a Facebook friends who insisted on saying ‘Bye’ to me because of the fact that I am still unmarried.

Anyway…’Boy Bye’ to that.

This made me wonder how difficult it is for a lady to deal with the pressure of being married say at 24. To me though, I think if a lady is mature enough to deal with the pressure of marriage at that age, filled with the wisdom to become ‘A WIFE and A MOTHER’ then why not get married at 24. This content went on Whatsapp and trust me, certain friends had differing thoughts and opinions. It is highly engaging.

Read on:

Grace:

Marry, when you are ready. Not following the stereotype laid down principle of people.

Really, a lady or guy needs to be really ready. Marriage is no child’s play. As a 24 year old, she may be ripe physically, but might not be emotionally ripe for the new stage. Relationship alone sef can make you go stupid at times, not to talk of marriage. To be emotionally ready depends on how she has been able to handle challenges on her own without getting out of proportion.

Kross:

Lol. 24 is young na.

She has all the time in the world. She can marry if she’s ready but 24 is not the You-are-supposed-to-be-married age for ladies. Only when she’s crosses 27, en route 30 can eyebrows be raised.

I still don’t see reason why people love to rush into marriage. I mean marriage is forever and a day more. Forever is scary, let alone the day after forever.

Elizabeth who sent in a voice note also had this to say:

 

24 is young bro! She hasn’t gotten around to being a single lady! That sh*t will mess up her mentality. Let me tell you a little Something I learnt from experience.

Most ladies that get married early are mostly shielded by their parents. Nigerian parents sometimes have a set stage for you in life. An MSc in the bag, a good job, next thing bring husband, bring husband. She gets married, realizes she’s in real life, if she’s not strong mentally, she begins to slowly crumble.

Social media preaches the sexual fairy-tale, she’s probably not been with more than 2 guys, sometimes, husband inclusive. At 30 she’s got all her kids, sees her mates living out what used to be her dream, God forbids the husband condemns her to a life of full housewife. She hears f*ck stories, husband starts to f*ck her less, she becomes vulnerable, tries an amazing d*ck Bam! She 35, unhappy, serious midlife crisis.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying in all cases, but I’m giving a scenario based on experience. It’s because of things like this that most ladies nowadays become pick me ladies. They all over the place, and most times the SETTLE all in the name of wanting to be a MRS. 5 years later, divorce!

I actually had this talk with a friend some days ago, he made me understand that married women are the most vulnerable to sexual shenanigans outside the marriage.

The society has painted this pious woman character but the fact remains that they do sh*t outside and save face with their marriages. I marveled at the number of married women on my friends case! All it took was a kiss and a caress in the right spot! An impressive d*ck is a cherry on the pie too! Some of them even go as far as introducing the said guy to their husbands just to save face! Most of these women have had 2 kids or more but you’ll know they sex starved.

I know a particular one who wants to leave her husband, they married at 23. When they were dating, he used to f*ck her like crazy, show emotions, be the perfect guy. Marriage changed all that! Man needed to hustle for the family, and he just got drowned in all the pressure. Now they been living together for 3 years now and they only have sex once in 3 months, she’s steady getting all the love and affection out there!

Then she added another angle to the whole discussion:

These single men don’t want to build a relationship no more!

They prefer married women! Why?

They are sure she won’t leave her whole family and string to their necks! They got freedom to do other girls, and the pussy!!!

How do you now determine when a lady should get married? It’s the lady’s choice!! The pressure shouldn’t push you into settling for any man that comes your way!!!
There are certain questions you need to ask yourself. Be honest with yourself.

Now she gave another interesting twist:

Why do you think a lot of women have postpartum depression??

I wrote a post about Post-Partum depression here. You might just want to read. Very important!

They get married, not even had time to enjoy their love, bam! She gets preggy and a year later there’s another human to look after! It has its psychological toll on the man too!!! He wants a WIFE!!! He’s a big baby himself!! But once there’s a baby, the story changes and he finds solace outside the home!!!

I see a lot of young men rushing to get married just so they can feel like a man, 5 years down the line, they back on the streets.

What then is the ripe age for marriage? Is 24 too young to get married as a lady? Why the sudden urgency or need for marriage when you are not emotionally ready. These questions are begging for answers. I can’t wait to see your comments.

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9 Comments

  • Reply
    Debs
    March 21, 2018 at 12:04 pm

    See, Elizabeth has hit the nail on the head. She’s just saying everything on my mind. Bottom line is, ‘Marry when you are ready’

    • Reply
      Detola Deedee
      March 21, 2018 at 12:12 pm

      ‘Marry when you are ready’.

      Nice, but then a lot of people may be ready at 24 years, don’t you think?

      • Reply
        Debs
        March 21, 2018 at 12:20 pm

        Very possible. We have the young and matured and we have the old and stupid. If you are certain you are ready, by all means please do.

  • Reply
    Seyi Adeyemo
    March 21, 2018 at 12:10 pm

    Anyone who cannot make decisions and own it, anyone who cannot apologize when absolutely unnecessary, anyone that cannot take corrections, anyone that cannot tolerate people and manage their shortcomings, anyone that cannot settle certain things in prayer, anyone that cannot forgive and let go of things, anyone that cannot make sacrifices for another or others, is not ready to be married. If they like, they can be 45 years old.

  • Reply
    Temitope
    March 21, 2018 at 1:29 pm

    All just out of societal pressures. Marry when you find love and capacity to maintain a home and make yourself happy.

  • Reply
    Chidimma
    March 21, 2018 at 5:21 pm

    you’re right my dear ‘marry when you find love and have the capacity to maintain a home and still make yourself happy. Not all these get admission, finish school, go for NYSC, after NYSC find husband.

  • Reply
    Mr. Bobby
    March 22, 2018 at 5:09 am

    Funny, sensible reactions. But seriously, age is not (and shouldn’t be) a criterion to determine when to marry. We are just stuck with this age thingy because of our African culture and cultural beliefs. When you know you’re matured enough to handle pressure and issues associated with marriage, you’re sure you’ve found someone who loves you and you love the person likewise, and you’re financially capable (for a man), you’re free to settle down. One thing I just hate is this Baby Daddy and Mama thing. It sucks to my hearing.

    • Reply
      Detola Deedee
      March 22, 2018 at 5:11 am

      I think you opened up another sensitive topic to be discussed on here. Thanks a lot for your comment.

  • Reply
    Bisco Ibitade
    July 13, 2018 at 1:13 am

    Wonderful reactions.

    I think we are all ready at different times. And knowing that time “for us” is key. We have seen people get married in their 30’s and ended up divorced in no time, just as we have seen marriages in early 20’s stand the test of time. For me, I think the virtue of patience and contentment is lacking, hence the situation we are today.

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