Okay, So I was checking through my new friends and their relationship status on Facebook a week ago. Guess what I saw? OPEN RELATIONSHIP! Do open relationships work? I was confused and enthralled at the same time!
I realized that I have added more female friends than usual. This has never happened before, never in the history of adding up friends this year have I added more female friends than the males. This month was an exception! My curiosity got the better of me and I decided to take it a step further! That was when I saw the open relationship status.
I recently added up 30 ladies and 25 of them were in an open relationship!! That’s about 85% of them right? I was shocked! Nigerians have always been known for closed relationships ? When did we become an advocate for open relationships, as I could see on my Facebook page.
Don’t get me wrong, as I am not being unreasonably hysterical about this! I just feel perplexed and concerned about this new basis for relationships!
I took this a step further and decided to chat with 13 out of the 25 in an open relationship. The reason was to ask what they understood by the relationship status and then what it means to them.
I understood from my chat that ‘Well while they love their boyfriends, they also have the opportunity to date or have sex with someone else! I was like What the heck!!??
To manage a simple conventional relationship and all of its wahala is really a big deal for some lovers, not to mention having a complicated relationship as that of the open relationship? How do you deal?
I went a step further, I asked them ‘how do you guys cope? This type of relationship lifestyle can be so weird and unconventional! How do you deal?’
We have laid down the principles, some of them said. He remains our number one and we understand that. Every other person is just an extra to our main relationship!
Hellurr!! Someone, please help me, Is there something like a main relationship and a support relationship? This is strange!!! Is that the way it works for some of us now? Having two boyfriends or two girlfriends, one is main, the other the support!
I went online and saw that open relationships have been on for quite sometime and lovebirds have been dealing. I even understood from MenFitnessdotcom that ‘ if the partners can both make it work, then having an open relationship can really work. The key is having a like minded individual, lay down ground rules, adhere strictly to the rules and just maybe the relationship can survive.
I even learned that people are now beginning to get interested in some new model of relationships that is away from the conventional type. The type you and I are used to! Interesting, isn’t it?
I have to be very factual with you guys, about my honest opinion. The case of open relationships is just like you having the Baileys Kind of Creamy Ice Cream from Cold stone and then the next day you just want to try the Vanilla.
Maybe tomorrow you want to try the Strawberry Cream with some chocolate toppings! You may be tired of the Vanilla and want to be more daring, but not ignoring the fact that the Baileys Kind of Creamy Ice cream is till your ‘numero uno’. Doesn’t it kind of sound odd when you treat your partner and relationship likes it’s some kind of ice-cream?
I am totally not a fan of open relationships! Although, now I am beginning to meet a lot of people who are in open relationships, at least I just got acquainted with another 25, and I ask myself, do they really love their partners? For me though, I cannot stand the idea of my partner sleeping with someone else.
I would and cannot do this to someone I truly care about and intend to have a long-term relationship with. It just wouldn’t work for me!
However, if there are other guys in an open relationship and they are dealing, well, it’s their decision. You come to me and expect that I recommend open relationships to you? No way!
I don’t want to think through this alone. Let me bring you in! What do you guys think? Is this reasonable and justified, or just the human race trying to get the better of ourselves!
Please don’t leave without sharing your thoughts!