Let’s talk about sexual purity in relationships. I have friends who are virgins and who have made a conscious, deliberate decision to keep their virginity until marriage. They believe in sexual purity and I respect and support their decision. Unfortunately, their boyfriends don’t.
Let me throw more light on this.
A girl meets a guy, they become friends, fall in love and decide to date. Now during the course of their being friends, the girl confides in the guy that she’s a virgin and she doesn’t indulge in sex before marriage, so if they have to date, there must be no sexual intimacy involved. The guy agrees to this rule and they go ahead to date. Few months into the relationship, the guy wants sex?
I recently had a girl in my inbox asking me about sex, we chat sparingly but I know she’s young and needs guidance, I’m not an authority when it comes to sex but I do know it is an activity which involves the consent of both partners. She’s young and has a boyfriend who’s 29 and wants sex. Prior to the relationship, they agreed that there wouldn’t be any sex involved and he supported that rule. Now he’s pressurizing her to have sex with him, using phrases like “If you love me, you’d do it”, “we are still going to get married so while wait na”, “you don’t trust me”.
She’s sad and confused and of course, she let him, and he told her to take Andrew liver salt after the intercourse
A 29 old man told a girl to take Andrew Liver salt after intercourse, although he told her he didn’t ejaculate. I would be flabbergasted if she knew what ejaculation was. Oga if you didn’t cum why did you tell her to take Andrew Liver Salt?
Surprisingly, I’m not mad at him. I’m mad at the Church!
They do little or nothing to help these young girls in their path of maintaining sexual purity. It’s madness enough that when they preach about virginity in church, they only refer to girls like everyone knows it takes two to tangle, so how about we start talking about sexual purity in both sexes. Secondly, you’re using fear and hell as a weapon to groom virgins, you already know that plan is going to flop.
I’m talking about the church because these girls draw their convictions from the church, they draw their morals and values from biblical principles. So the church has to step up, teach these girls practical examples, talk about situations as it affects them today, we’ve heard enough about the Virgin Mary, Mummy G.O please tell them your own life experience, how did you conquer sexual immorality in your time. Don’t pretend and act like you didn’t face these challenges.
Demystify sex for crying out loud!
One of my beautiful friends is going through so much pain because her boyfriend left her for another girl. The guy wants sex and she didn’t. I’m glad he left and I’m glad she didn’t give in.
What annoys me most is that these men know what they’re getting into, they agree to the terms of these relationships and later whine like babies. Why don’t you just date someone who doesn’t have a problem with sex in the first place?
Stop pressurizing Virgins!
About Olivia Sose Olivia Sose is a reader, writer, blogger, and social media enthusiast. She's passionate about the female child and sexual liberalism in Africa. She's opinionated about sex and relationships and lends a voice to the sex discourse in Africa. She's a graduate of the University of Port Harcourt where she bagged a degree in English Studies and intends furthering her studies in African/African American Literature. She also hopes in the nearest future to become a sex consultant and expert.
You can connect with Olivia on Facebook here.