Lifestyle Relationship Hacks



Due to popular demand and based on the reactions this story generated by going Front Page on Nairaland! My friend decided to share the aftermath of his discovery about Cynthia.


Still in a state of uttermost disbelief, I went back to Cynthia’s chat with Felix as it was the most recent of her escapades.

Cynthia had sworn to me and some other corpers about how she can never give blowjob as she used same mouth to praise God.

Well Felix commended her to be one of the best blow job giver ( Ah, I screamed!)

In the chat, he also requested for anal sex, which Cynthia obliged.

Probing further, I realised that Felix was a senior banking officer with a now defunct popular bank but stingy, as Cynthia complained in their chats, stating that the N4,000 she got as transport fare the last time was too small.

Cynthia also complained about the high fee of the hotel they used the last time, stating that it was too expensive. Na Wa oh! See my Christian girlfriend.

Apparently, I get to spend the money she couldn’t get from these guys because I am the ‘MuMu’ guy! Oh Lordie Lord!

I decided to take a walk to clear my head, I strolled round the school telling myself I must be one of the biggest fools alive.

I began to strategize on how to confront Cynthia. I thought it was best if I make a call ( as e dey hot).

I placed a call to Cynthia that night and confronted her with what I had discovered.

Cynthia immediately went on the offensive saying it was just chats bla bla bla. They were not true! ( I mean ladies are so good at lieing, Haaahaa??)

I told her I was done with her, it was over between us, that I would pack her things back to her room as we were living together. (Couple Corpers) .

She told me to do what pleased me and that she was disappointed I believed those mind blowing revelations in the chats.

At that point, I was confused and sceptical.

You know why?

Our corpers lodge was a mini FUJI house of commotion with fights everyday.

People make jest and mockery of themselves over every little thing.

Now, I was concerned about telling everyone what happened and moving Cynthia’s stuffs out of my room.

Being a ‘pokenose’ I was sure all the other corpers would want to sniff their noses around to know what exactly happened and I would be made mockery of, being the ‘MuMu’ in this case.

I was in another quagmire; I thought about what I could do to get this girl out of my life in the most subtle way possible.

While I was packing Cynthia’s things in my room, I came across a strange tablet. The hair on my head rose again, I have never come across such a table before.

The table was hexagon shaped with the imprint Searle 1451.

I decided to google the code and found out it was an abortion pill, I exclaimed Jesus.

Cynthia still ‘yabbed’ her friend Ada that last time they had a rancour as to how she had aborted twice.

How can someone who had done abortion criticize her fellow girlfriend of doing same. I was weak already, I became weaker.

Obviously realizing that I would have found out more damning information, Cynthia called back after 2 hours and began to beg, told me I should wait for her to come back from Lagos.

She lamented that it was because I refused to sleep with her which was why she had get it outside. Can you imagine?

During the few times we kissed and smooched, she would tell me to stop whenever I wanted to take it a step further. Cynthia told me point blank as a lady it was normal for her to feign refusal and I should have pushed harder.

Imagine, pushed harder ko! Then she would now accuse me of rape. Girls sha!

Cynthia came back two days later and started to beg and cajole me.

I had two options break up with her or stay.

Breaking up would have made the whole lodge know what was up.

I told her I would only stay if she agreed to share the honey pot with me. My mind was made up already and I tried to block all sort of emotional affiliations with her.

Believe me, it was difficult trying to get her out of my mind; the love, the sacrifices, how I thought I had already gotten a wife!


I was pained deep down, but I knew I had no choice than to get her out of my mind!

I knew it would take time for me to forget about her completely, but for all my money’s worth! I must enjoy the honey pot as well, all the mouth action and what have you!

And so it began!

For the last 2 months of my NYSC we had mind blowing sex but I was having to spend more on her.

Now I realize that spending my money was my own decision and not because I love her! Hmmmn!

I treated her like the way the men she went to meet did!

As NYSC was about to come to an end, we both knew it had to end after pop in October, Cynthia demanded for my final Allawi N39800, because she needed to buy cloths in preparation for corporate world.

Well, I stupidly obliged. Till now, I still ask myself why I did that. Or can you please answer for me?

I went to back to PortHarcourt empty handed with no savings despite earning N19800 alawe, 5k state Allawi and 25k from my uncle monthly.

Even though I was played by Cynthia, I’m still glad I met her because the discovery opened my eyes! I became wiser and smarter to women and their evil machinations.

I also learned that most girls become bad most times due to the action of guys or what happened in the past.

Cynthia lost her Virginity to a guy some years back, who later sent her a text which she showed me.

You think I’m a fool, I know you used drugs to seal your honeypot to deceive me”.

That text, whether true or not did not move me one bit. I had been lied and played, and that was it!

Till today, I don’t bother checking my partner’s phone anymore as I have come to realize that no one is a saint and we all have our pasts.

Let me burst your bubble:

Late last year, my dear Cynthia got married to a pastor and till date, I still see her religious posts on Facebook which always make me reel with laughter.

But wait a minute guys, can Cynthia ever change?



PhotoCredit : NYSCOnline


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