IS MARRIAGE AN ACHIEVEMENT?
Walk into that home by your right-hand side, then observe and walk into the other home by your left-handed side, come out and tell me what you have noticed in both houses.
In House A
- A girl being taught how to sit and dress properly.
- A girl being taught how to cook.
- A girl being told to sweep, to clean and put things in order.
In the same house is a boy who is at his lunch
- Being taught how to greet elders properly.
- Playing football.
- Doing school take-home works.
In House B
It’s almost the same, just that the girl in this house has toys to play with, she has a male and female dolls and she is trying to make them live together.
~ Girls are being taught marriage and home keeping since they were born. Every day of their lives, something is implanted into them to remind them that soon, they will be married. Boys are being raised all the days of their lives to be men, they are told not to cry, not to show weaknesses, just muscles, they are taught to gang up and fight back because they must not lose.
~ Women from childhood have been taught and trained to value and esteem marriage above all other things in life as failure to do so will mean that they are wasted. They are taught to appreciate marriage and put their heads under a man to husband them because failure to achieve that will mean they have no identity in their lives. The boys on the other hand simply grow into the beard gang and six packs gang.
~ Because of this terrible and recurrent cultural landslide, the appreciation of marriage one-sided. Only a party to it wants it to work out, 80% of people who consult me are women. So, are women the only ones who ought to appreciate marriage, see it as an achievement or a life prize?
Is marriage an achievement?
Socially, psychologically and spiritually marriage can be an achievement only IF YOU ARE MARRIED TO THE RIGHT PERSON BEING A RIGHT PERSON YOURSELF.
God, Himself especially opens a chamber of grace over every man who marries a good woman and treats her right.
 He who finds a [true] wife finds a good thing and OBTAINS FAVOR from the Lord.
~ Every human is in one way or another favored by God, but for God to have specifically mentioned that sect of marriage, then being married to a good woman is a blank cheque and an open heaven on such a man. Happily married people can relate to how much relief their partners have brought into their lives. Unhappy couples wish they could get out and start afresh. So why do we say it is not an achievement to be married just because we are pained and allow ourselves to be blinded by the ugly news on TV?
~ Several times in my life I have wished there was some one who can run with me, hold hands with me, teach and help me save, show me other perspectives to life, join me to pray when I am overwhelmed by spiritual responsibilities but I am standing alone. Yet you tell me not to see my union to that amazing woman as a trophy when she comes to me? In the midst of other marital crisis?
 Now the Lord God said, It is not good (sufficient, satisfactory) that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper meet (suitable, adapted, complementary) for him.
~ If you have somebody in your life who can run with you and fits into you like the verse above depicts, you are BLESSED. From your relationship, you can foresee what your marriage will be like. I believe that your marriage starts the day you agreed to date each other.
This is because the things you do and do not do from that moment will tell on your marriage on the long run. Marriage is the same things as dating and romantic relationship, it’s just that marriage is a higher level to it that allows you the benefits gotten by officiating your relationship (via a wedding ceremony and exchange of vows).
~ Marry right and don’t take it with levity, choosing your spouse is choosing your future and if you marry right, you are highly favored by God because a good marriage is as it is the ONLY thing on earth that fully depicts God’s relationship with man.
About The Writer - El Ifelola El Ifelola is a Graduate of Law, Writer, Researcher, Life and Social Relationships Coach and a lover of God. Reading, Ifelola loves researching, talking to, enlightening and motivating people. He stands for self-identity and strength and Godliness.