People get sad, depressed, devastated, heartbroken and DROWNING!
For some of us, we have made it our duties to help these categories of people drowning. Not only just because at that point in time, they need shoulders to lean on, but more because we feel that we owe them the responsibility to help them through these tough times.
Yes, it is a good thing we all are doing. There is nothing as beautiful and rewarding as helping fellow humans through emotional situations.
In 2017, I had to meet 40 people. Yes 40! Who had one emotional situation or the other. It was a truly crazy time understanding emotional drivers in people and figuring out ways to help them. It was a blessing that I met these people, listened to their problems, support and help them through the phase.
But what I did not realize at that time was the fact that, helping to save them from their emotional turmoil took a part of me. I became emotionally fragile, insecure, AFRAID.
I became less concerned about my relationship because I figured that if people who gave the best of themselves could be in such a situation, then what makes me any better. People could die anytime, get heartbroken, get devastated and in a spate of depression! So what makes me any better?
I became nonchalant that it affected my relationships with people, with my woman. I felt feeble, vibrant energy reducing! It seemed like as I poured more into people’s predicaments, I was getting sapped as well!
If you are like me then know that you are not alone in this.
For some of us, offering oneself as a living sacrifice to helping people through their tears is a no brainer. We feel so attached to people that we are sure we need to save them from their emotional turmoil. But you need to be aware that supporting people emotionally will take away a part of you gradually.
Have you noticed that when you empathize and provide shoulders to cry on, you are affected psychologically as well? Empathizing with people breeds emotional connection that saps YOU!
Have you noticed this?
When you save people, when you help, you give out a bit of the emotional oil that makes you a counselor, psychologist and helper. When you are directly involved in getting people up and saving them from drowning, you become attached to them – physically, spiritually, emotional and psychologically!
Just before you know it, you realize you are an emotional wreck yourself and begin to need people to cry, lean on! It is not because you ain’t strong, it is because you have failed to fill yourself back up – emotional replenishment! You are drained as well!
While you prepare yourself for people who need your help, it is essential that you are ready for what happens after. Get yourself replenished – physically, emotionally, spiritually, and psychologically! If you don’t make efforts on your own and you only believe in your mental and psychological strength. Trust me YOU WILL DROWN!
People are transferring their emotional problems to you, hoping to be relieved of these issues, and so you need to be ready at the beginning, during and after the whole support process.
Read books, leverage relationships, find support from those you love, build communities, talk to people, go on trips, clear your head, get closer to your family. You need to draw strengths from situations and people to keep your oil flowing!
Just Before you save the next person! SAVE YOURSELF!
Enjoy this Save Myself Video – Ed Sheeran: