Have you heard of the name Jean Adams? I never heard of it until I stumbled on the post of a Nigerian Doctor, Dr. Olufunmilayo is popularly known as OurFavOnlineDoctor on Twitter. Doctor Funmi shared this heartbreaking story and lessons to learn from it. I learned about love, pain, and tears, and I hope this does something to you too.
Read and reflect:
Jean Adams, a French footballer, has been in a coma for 37years – due to a mistake his doctor made while putting him to sleep for a surgery to repair a torn ligament. His wife Bernadette, who he married in 1969 still stays by his bed till today. A story of love. Of pain. Of tears.
Sometimes you think of life and you just wonder what is the point of it all. Someone can be hale and hearty- with the world literally at their feet today – and tomorrow they are dead, or in a coma or in some serious illness that completely changes their lives forever.
The interesting but sad part of this story is the said doctor and his colleague only went to jail for a month and was fined about 815 dollars. That’s all. For an error that has cost a man his entire life, cost his family a father and a husband and cost the world a great athlete.
I ran into the story this morning- and it just broke my heart. The wife tends for him, looks after him, feeds him and with the help of nurses and physiotherapists who come every day- she’s able to bathe him and provide 24hours daycare. No love I know beats this.
We will never know of true love – if things always work out and nothing tests our resolve. Love is an action word. Love is not just roses and vacations. Love is giving up yourself and your life, if need be, for someone else. That woman is a gem.
And will always be.
He was 34 when he went into a coma. He is 71 years old now. He has spent 37 years unconscious. The time he has spent in a coma is now officially more than the time he has spent being aware of himself and his surroundings. We can never imagine how sad and traumatic this must be.
Many of us only share stories of love that never lasted, of love that only hurts and of love that was never real or true. Many of us only think that the whole concept of love is impossible and unrealistic going by what we see and hear, Many of us think Love is dead.
But stories like this, And people like Jean Pierre Adams and Bernadette remind us that maybe we need to look harder- Maybe we are looking in the wrong places and at the wrong people- Maybe Love is not only when the flowers are there, the going is good and the lights are bright.
Maybe love is not only in gifts and the things we can get or gain; maybe love is not only in putting ourselves first and thinking the world revolves around us; Maybe Love is in putting the other person first. Maybe Love is in caring for someone even when they can’t pay us back.
Maybe love is in praying over them even when they can’t open their mouths to talk. Maybe love is in bathing them every day even when they can’t do it themselves anymore. Maybe love is in hoping- even when it makes no sense to hope again. Maybe love is to care without an agenda.