- 1 How to know if your wife is cheating
- 1.1 She takes your picture of her office desk
- 1.2 She takes you off her social media profile
- 1.3 She changes the password on her mobile phone
- 1.4 She suddenly calls you by another name in bed
- 1.5 No, you can’t do the laundry, please!
- 1.6 She doesn’t post about you anymore
- 1.7 And her phone is always on silent mode
- 1.8 She’s staying late at work – all the time
- 1.9 She always wants details about your itinerary
- 1.10 She suddenly takes an interest in her physique
- 1.11 She hides things from you
- 1.12 She’s the one accusing you of cheating
- 1.13 She’s leaving your circle of friends
- 1.14 In the bedroom, she wants to try something new
How to know if your wife is cheating
In the past, marital infidelity was the domain of men. Due to shifting social norms and economic leaps women are now as likely as men to have affairs. Women are closing the gap, so to speak. Recent data from the National Opinion Research Centers General Social Survey, the number of women who are now having affairs have increased 40 percent in the past twenty years.
One in six married women now admits to having an affair.
Researchers also say women are more likely to cheat to considering that better employment is open to them now, hence, they now enjoy more economic independence. The consequences of cheating on their mate are less likely to affect them financially.
The situation is not so disheartening yet. Wondering if your wife is one among the statistics that cheat? Women are so subtle and good at maintaining a double life that it is almost impossible to tell an adulterous wife from a faithful one. If this is true how then can you tell that your wife is cheating on you?
Well, you are possibly reading this article at this time because you have suspicions that your better half is cheating. If your wife is doing —or not doing— the following things then it may mean she is cheating on you:
She takes your picture of her office desk
If your wife works her job in an office, you may have dropped by once or twice to pick her up for a date. Or to eat at a restaurant. Or whatever else that husband’s drop by their wives workplace for. You’ve seen that framed picture of you both on her desk, the one you took with her on your six month wedding anniversary, or one year, as the case may be.
If you drop by recently and that framed photo isn’t there anymore, and you’ve been having suspicions, then this may be a sign that she is cheating with her boss, a colleague. (Or the janitor. What, we’ve seen that happen many times, come on.)
You suddenly find —not by design, though— that her relationship status on social media; Facebook, Twitter, and the others suddenly disappears, why do you suppose your very pretty wife would do such a thing? Perhaps you have noticed subtle signs?
If you check your wife’s profile and there is nothing about her marital status there anymore. You may ask her why. Be assured that she will have an explanation, cheaters always do.
She changes the password on her mobile phone
There are countless reasons why people may change their phone password. Perhaps they are under suspicion that a third-party knows that password, or that they are being hacked. For a wife, she may change it but notify her husband of such changes especially if they both have a mutual agreement to be open with each other in this department. If now you can’t have access, and she is refusing to let you, then, dad, be on guard.
She suddenly calls you by another name in bed
Aw man, now this is some really deep issue. So little else quench a man’s ego and drives him mad than hearing his wife scream another man’s name in bed. This is a Freudian slip that befalls all humans. In the intensity of lovemaking, your wife claws and calls some strange name, ‘Jack!’
You are not Jack, you are Bill. So who the heck is Jack?
No, you can’t do the laundry, please!
So it’s the weekend, you both are at home doing chores. She’s done the cooking and you think she should rest a bit so you go for the laundry but she isn’t having it. She’s holding on to the laundry, she’s saying she’ll do it. But you can tell she’s tired.
Maybe she doesn’t want you to catch a whiff of that cologne that isn’t yours, or she is afraid you might find a ticket to a restaurant that you didn’t take her to. We’re just saying.
She doesn’t post about you anymore
We are talking a whole lot of changes going on in her life here. In the days following your wedding your wife posts stuff about you both, photos. And that’s something she’s kept up since you both met and started dating. But lately she’s fumigated her social media and she’s stopped posting photos of you.
Could that be so she’d appear available? Was this right after she opened a new account, claiming that she lost the password for the former one? You know…
And her phone is always on silent mode
Secrecy is always an aid to infidelity. And a cheating wife uses it to the maximum. You’d be a lot more suspicious if her phone keeps ringing and she is not answering it than if it was on silent. But of course, if your wife was known to receive a moderate amount of calls periodically but suddenly it ceases, then you should begin asking why this is so.
She’s staying late at work – all the time
She starts coming home late from the office out of the blue. This is an indication that she may be romantically involved with someone at work. Of course, there are times that she may legitimately have reasons to stay late. But you should be careful if this happens too often.
She always wants details about your itinerary
If your wife is cheating and is trying to cover her tracks, she’ll need to know your whereabouts all the time, when you are coming home and things like that. Or she’d want to know exactly when you leave the office, and could you please get some groceries? That should give her a little more time at her escapades with her lover.
It is a well known follow up by cheaters, men and women alike. But women get their way most often. When a wife asks her husband these questions he is likely to respond without suspicion. But suspicious, you should be.
She suddenly takes an interest in her physique
She’s exercising now, and it is not as a result of your urging nor is it a new year resolution thing. What’s that all about? And then she’s in front of the mirror checking to see how good her clothes now look on her. Dad, could she be doing this to impress someone else?
You never know with women.
She hides things from you
When your wife is cheating, she will hardly come out straight about stuff you want to know, things you should know. She will hedge. When this happens often then know that she has something to hide, something like an adulterous lifestyle.
Rafi Bilek of Baltimore Therapy Center says, “When a relationship isn’t working, you may find your partner sharing less and less with you.”
Says the expert, “Sharing is a sign of closeness and connection – and when that deteriorates it’s a sign that you are becoming more disconnected instead.”
Often a cheating wife would hedge and would not be upfront if she doesn’t want to be caught.
She’s the one accusing you of cheating
Says an expert, “It’s quite manipulative… because they get so upset during the conversation, you start to think they hate cheating and would never do it to you, when in reality they might have [done it] already.”
This is a classic case of guilt transfer or sharing. The cheating wife feels so much guilt for what they have – or are doing, that they want their spouse to feel as bad as they do. What’d they say about there being love in sharing?
Whatever the case may be, when this happens often in conversation about fidelity then it is usually a sure sign that your wife is having an affair.
The expert concluded, “These accusations are often a sign of self-guilt, and it also will put the blame on you, causing you to be on the defense and distracted from their actions.”
She’s leaving your circle of friends
Usually, incessant acts of infidelity inevitably lead to a separation or divorce. If a woman is preparing to leave her husband for her lover, she begins to about even her husband’s friends. She’ll avoid them just in case she slips during a conversation. Or how terrible will it be if one day she and her husband are meeting with their friends and there is this new guy among them and he happens to know her, intimately?
Awkward right? Right.
She doesn’t want to go to that restaurant.
That night when you decided you both should eat dinner at a particular restaurant you picked out because they opened recently and they serve Italian food, but your wife suddenly grew nervous and suggested she cook instead —now you wonder if your wife no longer digs Italian recipes.
Laura F. Dabney, MD. a psychotherapist and marriage expert says this could be because her and her new lover frequent the very restaurant you suggested, and she doesn’t want to risk getting recognized by the waitstaff.
In the bedroom, she wants to try something new
Trying new things in the bedroom is good, to spice up your romantic life. But usually, it is men who often bring up these tricks. If your wife suggests it, she may be getting the inspiration from another man if not you.
Moreover, if she suddenly begins to bang out again with her single friends so often that her married friends seldom get to see her, then this is an indication that she is cheating and doesn’t want a friend who would tell her what she’s doing is wrong around her.
If you notice any or a group of these symptoms, then you should be worried.