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Samuel Otareri – Nigerians And Shenanigans

samuel otareri

Sometimes you see a post about the killings in Benue.

Then people begin to comment and comment, flexing their intellectual muscles here and there.
Then before you know it, they aren’t talking about Benue killings anymore.

Somewhere deep in the tread, they are laughing and talking about jollof rice and frog meat.

You know, this kind of thing…’sniff’…this kind of thing…’sniff’ ‘sniff’…is the reason NEPA has not given us light in 2 weeks.
Two whole weeks!!

People can not just make up their mind and stay on course.
Girls want to be astronauts and facebook slay Queen at the same time.
Soon they get bodied and carried away.
And the small boys…, they want to be atheists.
Can you believe that??

Meanwhile, in Ibadan, rain wants to be falling everyday.
Like, fall yesterday, today and tomorrow. It has forgotten that Saturdays are sacred.
There are women to be brided, and men to be groomed; cakes to be cut and I do’s to be said; shaku shaku to be danced and jollof to be chowed.

Come on, leave Saturdays out of your working days, alright?

The rain actually started.
But on behalf of all the amala and meat that are steaming in coolers across the great city, one sly wind just came and swept the clouds toward North Korea😁

It should go and fall on all the nuclear weapons over there.
Let there be weddings!

Tola just made a post about a wedding where they are serving agbalumo.
See, I will provoke. Whose idea was that?
Is it symbolic of something or what?
If I m in that wedding I will kidnap the cake!
Then I will ask them to come and pay ransom with three coolers of Amala and five coolers of meat.
O, I’m tired of life, I don’t want again.
Agbalumo, to ri olohun.

I recall one wedding I was at in Ijebu ode back in the days.
Wasiu kwam1 was singing and telling stories, rich people were spraying money so much you couldn’t see the floor anymore. And Amala was everywhere you turned.
Once a while, young women came to our table to sell tom tom, bitter cola and stuff.
Everywhere was rowdy and noisy.
Then this young man came and whispered in my ears,
“Gbogbonise wa o.”

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