Are you a Woman looking for serious relationship? Then see all you need to know right here.
The companionship of love is one of the most important human need. It is so important that without it people have been known slip into certain depression. A lot of people are in relationships that are not going anywhere, it is filled with pain and tears, anxieties and eventual heartbreaks. Yet a serious relationship is important to find a marriage mate. A relationship is important but so is the sense to know the right one from that which is headed for a destructive end. In this regard will enter are usually hard hit the most. Many women complain about being taken for a ride by unserious men. So if you are a woman and you are looking to go into a serious relationship what are the things to note?
This list is by no means exhaustive, but the following are things a woman looking for serious relationship needs to ponder before putting her feet in the water.
1. Understand who you are
A lot of women looking for serious relationship go into relationships hoping to be treated with understanding whereas even she does not understand herself nor who she is. You need to know how your body works, mentally, physically and psychologically. A woman needs to understand her needs and how she hopes to meet them, the totality of her being. There is a correlation between this understanding and the quality of her relationship, and thus her well being. As we are going to find out subsequently a relationship is not a place where you go to find yourself. It is a place you take an already fulfilled self. A broken woman should not go into a serious relationship before she heals, she should heal first. Until then she’s only going to probably repeat the cycle of hurt all over again.
2. Know exactly what you want
This one of the very first things to consider before allowing yourself to get serious with that guy. Before you get carried away by the nice trimmed beards, the suave looks and the romance he’s bringing, know exactly what you want from the relationship.
You need to have clear and specific goals. To be sure you could even write them down in your diary. Read them aloud, research them, find out the steps you need to achieve these relationship goals. If it’s something serious you are looking for, then let that guide the kind of man you date. You must be looking for a serious man, not a Playboy if you’re interested in the long term. Ask yourself:
Who’s my ideal man? If you have a mental picture of him and his character it would not be hard to tell where the relationship is headed after the third date. You need to know the traits of the man you want before you meet him. Do you need a principled man? Without inputting a preconceived trait into the man’s actions, you can easily tell if his meeting up to your expectations. Of course, you should keep your expectations moderate.
3. Know when to back out
Beforehand, know when you have reached a point where you should call it quits. We are talking about your deal breaker. Know what your deal-breaker will be, that point when your gut tells you, ‘Nope, this is it, I’m not gonna take this anymore.’
This is difficult for many women. Especially the desperate ones who think they are incomplete unless they are in a relationship, even if that relationship is taking all their self worth to keep it going. No one should have to fuel a relationship with the juice of the self-respect until they are lost totally. If you find that your partner has a propensity to be abusive, he shoved you once, Lady, that’s likely your deal breaker. Push comes to shove and then the next time he just might lose himself and hit you.
The truth is there is no perfect man anywhere. And there are no perfect women as well. Yet a woman should advocate self-improvement. Every human should understand and work on their weaknesses. Consequently, a woman looking for serious relationship should decide what sort of man she wants to be with, what sort of traits she can tolerate in a man. And the one she can not live with.
4. Your weaknesses
Know thy self, says an aphorism.
This point can never be overemphasized. As we have said already, a woman must understand who she is. This includes understanding to the best of your ability, your weaknesses and of course your strengths too. You must know if your partner can deal with your baggage, but you must know how heavy your baggage is too.
You need a clear understanding of the shortcomings that you are bringing into your relationship. If you find yourself a man who bears your moments of stupidity without so many complaints, then that may help you see how much to hope for in that relationship.
5. Know your temperament
Are you an introvert or an extrovert?
Extroverts deal with problems externally. They may be quick to express their frustrations openly, is this who you are? If yes, this will bear out in your relationship. It will affect how you relate and how far you would go. Whereas introverts deal with their problems internally. They shut off themselves, they enjoy being alone all day. Where an extroverted person enjoys outdoor activities with friends, an introverted person may just want to sit, read a book and listen to music all week.
If you have not found a serious relationship as a result of being introverted you may begin to feel that something is fundamentally wrong with you.
Before you go into a serious relationship know your financial strength. You need to analyze how you use money. Are you a spendthrift? You wasteful with money? Do you think you might be stingy? Important questions if you ask me.
Would you be willing to split the bill if you go on dates? How about at the movies, would you be offended if you have to buy your ticket or refreshments? If things progressed to the point where you probably moved in with your partner would you split bills with them? Are you prepared for the financial obligations of being in a serious relationship?
7. You can still hold on to Your Career
The waters of relationships can be deep, and when you are in it to a point things are bound to get tumultuous if you are a woman who has and loves her career but your partner encounters difficulties accommodating said career.
Suppose you are someone who is employed in the medical field, say, a nurse. Your work schedule is expected to be hectic. Some days you get bogged down at the hospital so much that you forget about your date several evenings. It would take some adjustments for your partner. How do you deal with this issue? Will you give up your career as a nurse if after all is said and done that seems to be the only option to save your relationship?
One thing though, being in a serious relationship does not mean you have to give up your career. What makes you a woman isn’t your relationship. Yet a relationship and a career can go hand-in-hand and side by side. One doesn’t have to suffer on account of the other.
8. It doesn’t have to be love at first
This is an extremely important point for a woman who wants a serious relationship. Forget what you’ve seen in movies and all those mushy stuff in books. In reality, many successful relationships go through many hurdles at first. So much so that you begin to wonder if it is ever going to work.
Remember that it may not look or been feel like love at first, and it’s okay.
9. Take it slow
In a world where it seems like you have to fight for everything the advice to take it slow when you are in a relationship is very good advice. People around you keep trying to influence everything and you, all to their benefit you can’t but want to join them. But let things flow. Let things take their natural course. Don’t try to force and beat your relationship into the shape of your dreams. If you do that you run the risk of being lied to, tricked and eventually broken.
Let your partner be who they are meant to be as you work towards your self-improvement. Better a love that arrived late than one that is based on deception. Once again, the romance you read about usually come summarized. Yours may take months or two years to eventually attain respectability.
10. Resist pressure
An important point this is. There will be internal and external pressures to contend with. Internal pressure includes the urge for sex. We know that you probably have been alone for a long time, waiting for the right man to let yourself go with. Just a few days into the relationship and things get heavy, the next thing you may feel like, “this is it!”
But no girl, this isn’t necessarily it. Resist the urge to appear desperate and cheap. Resist this new morality that says it doesn’t matter if you gave it up on the first date, that you own your body. Girl, you do own your body, but you are also going to own the eventual loss of self-respect and heartbreak.
That’s the external pressure talking, pushing you to ruin a potentially good relationship. Don’t budge. Know exactly what you want and pursue that goal. Understand your value system. Own your weaknesses and work on improving yourself always. You are a woman whether you have a man or not.
Are you a Woman looking for serious relationship? Let us know in the comment below. We can help you!